Jasper is 7 weeks old today. I can’t believe how fast time is flying by..only 5 more weeks until I have to go back to work. More on that later.

But first, some pictures of Jasper and his Grandpa F. who came all the way from Marco Island Florida to meet him:

Poor Grandpa, Jasper was on his worst behavior this weekend.. seriously, it was a whole new level of fussing, and just when we though we were seeing some improvement!

He did have some OK moments like when we all went for a walk and Jeff got to wear Jasper in the tricked out Bjorn that Jay & Sarah gave us for our shower:

Aren’t my men handsome??

I was attributing Jasper’s behavior to the fact that I have a sore throat and though maybe he did too, until I realized today that he is teething already! I can’t believe I missed the signs until now.. a few days ago he started drooling which he’d never done before. Plus he’ll put anything in his mouth to suck on, like the straps of his baby carrier, carseat or whatever is around. All of that would be anecdotal except that I actually can see the whites of at least two teeth pushing up on his lower left gums.

I can’t believe we are going from colic to teething with no break in between!

The past two nights I have given in and stopped trying to swaddle and put Jasper to sleep on his back. He has slept on my chest all night long. We both get MUCH more sleep that way, it’s just that my back starts to ache half way through the night. I think I’d rather have the sleep though.

Also, I am starting to get freaked out that Jasper has to go to daycare in 5 weeks.. he has a lot of shaping up to do before he could possibly be ready. For one thing, he has to be able to sleep on his back, and for another he has to fall asleep other than on the boob or from me bouncing him - at least I assume they won’t have time to bounce him to sleep. At the very least they certainly won’t be nursing him to sleep.

And of course I am completely torn up at the idea that I have to leave him at all.. 3 months just seems so young still for that.

Speaking of young, as in brand new, my good friend and frequent commenter Dawn gave birth to a beautiful baby girl September 22nd.. I just wanted to publicly congratulate her and Walter on the new addition to their perfect little family and say welcome to the world baby Kate!

And no longer tongue tied..(more on that later). But first, introducing Jasper Bear:

Jasper at Six Weeks

So I think it’s true what they say, babies get worse until 6 weeks and then start getting better until 3 months. This past week there have been several really good days, particularly Sunday when Sarah, Jay and baby Daphne came to visit. Jasper was playful, slept peacfully (during the day) and we even took him to the mall where he drank the bottle I brought with no fussing and we even breast fed for the first time in public using my hooter hider.

This doesn’t seem like a big deal, but anyone who’s watched him breastfeed at home would know that it’s quite a coup given the way he pulls off and needs to be burped every minute or two!  It felt so liberating just knowing that I can bring him places and not need to rush home to breastfeed, particularly since he’s been eating every two hours for the last 10 days or so.  That extra hour we used to get made such a big difference, I hope we get it back someday!

He had his tongue tie “surgery” last Thursday. I can’t say it wasn’t traumatic for me, but Jasper took it like a champ. I had to leave the room and my mom held his head steady.. when I came back in he had some dried blood smeared around his little mouth and it broke my heart. I cried the whole time I was out of the room listening to him cry. He started screaming at the top of his lungs the minute they swaddled him to confine him and my mom said there was no discernable difference in his cry from that to when they actually made the two snips (upper lip and tongue).  The Dr. said the part they hate most is when the Dr. has to apply pressure inside the mouth for 4 minutes to stop the bleeding.

After that, he breast fed immediately and calmed down and slept the 75 minute drive home. He was pretty good that night too, though the next day I think his tongue hurt him because he would let out little random cries periodically. But the worst of it was over within 48 hours.

The crazy thing is that we could see the difference in his mouth and expressions right away! I saw the tip of his little tongue for the first time ever. He also moves his upper lip more now, and can stick his tongue out beyond his gumline. I’ve also seen it go up to his soft palate, which was the whole point of the procedure to begin with.

I wish I could say it’s solved his tummy problems, but it hasn’t yet. I can feel that he’s capable of latching deeper now, but he still gulps, chokes, sputters and loses suction, particularly during let down. It could be that he may never be able to handle my over active let down, or, it could just be that he hasn’t learned to use his “new” tongue correctly yet. I have the lactation consultant coming back on Thursday so maybe she’ll be able to help us.

The good news is that he’s becoming a really happy daytime baby! The periods of happy, calm alertness are increasing and it seems that he only cries if he’s wet, has a big burp that needs to come out, or is hungry.

Nighttime is a different story.. he still has terrible gas pains that keep him crying, grunting, squirming and groaning in his sleep - and keep me from getting much sleep! If I put him on my chest, it stops some of the crying, but he still squirms too much for me to sleep well. He farts so much that I can’t tell if it’s all a result of air he swallowed while eating or if its an intestinal reaction to the content of the breast milk.

So, for now, the mystery of Jasper’s digestion continues. In the meantime, as we draw nearer to that magical 3 month mark, he will probably (hopefully!) grow out of it before we ever find out what it is!

So it’s not ALL bad over here at the Dark Lord’s Lair..we occasionally get some rays of sunshine, like when jasper smiles - and we can actually capture it on video!

We also had a fairly decent day yesterday - Jasper seemed more comfortable than usual, maybe it’s the wellements gripe water I started giving him? He seemed his gas was passing more freely yesterday without so much crying and grunting and groaning from him. It could also be that I’ve been giving him the full max dose of Zantac, but that wouldn’t effect his lower GI, so I’m not really sure to what we owe our pleasant day.

Even more exciting is that Jasper slept from 9pm - 3am yesterday! And then again at 6am. Now I understand why he wanted to be on the boob from 7pm through 9pm straight…he was trying to gear up for the night. Or maybe I give him too much credit. Either way, it was the most restful night I’ve had since he was born.

We also had a great morning, Jasper started cooing and laughing on his changing table after I changed him.. he was on his back, so that’s rare! We played some peek-a-boo and danced to Bob Marley and then he ate and is now sleeping!

He’s also getting more interested in the things around him. We put a mobile that moves and plays music on his basinnette/co-sleeper and he’s totally fascinated by it. Makes me wish I didn’t get so many toys that don’t do flashy things  - like all that FP rainforest stuff that I aesthetically HATE, but clearly they serve their purpose - babies love them even if parents don’t.

Here are a few pictures of Jasper enjoying his Skip Hop Spaceship Tummy Time Mat that his auntie Roxy bought him:

I guess I’m starting to see a light at the end of the tunnel… A sneek peak into the happy baby boy Jasper of the future and I love it!

I know it’s been a while since I posted. Jasper has gotten worse to the point that I can rarely put him down at all. He has stopped liking being in the Moby wrap (usually get about 5 minutes before he grunts and groans and turns red, most likely “pushing” due to gas), hates his bouncy chair and will only occasionally tolerate being put in his swing. He also will not sleep unless it’s on one of our chests, so that pretty much rules out me getting ANYTHING done.

This also accounts for why I haven’t been able to take any pictures of him from weeks 2-4 (yes, our little guy is now one month old!)

I do have these two though, can you believe how different he looks already?

The Dark Lord

Jasper or Satan?

All kidding aside, it has been an incredibly trying two weeks. I’ve cried more times than I can count, sometimes out of frustration and feeling sorry for myself, other times out of sadness that Jasper is in SO much discomfort. He basically only has about 2 ten minute periods a day when he is awake and NOT crying.

The rest of the time he is either eating or “sleeping”. I say “sleeping” in quotation marks because he squirms, grunts, cries, arches and screams in his sleep.  So even his sleep doesn’t give us any respite from his unhappiness.

The news isn’t all bad though, here are some positives: His growth is fabulous. He is gaining a tad over an oz. a day. At his one month well visit he was 10lbs 6 oz and 20.5 inches.  He also has started social smiling! One smile has the effect of washing away at LEAST half a day’s misery. (Too bad he doesn’t do it more often.)

He is still on Zantac, though I’m tempted to take him off. It’s been over a week and he is certainly NOT better. The pedi said we could up his dose, but I haven’t yet.. I just don’t feel comfortable doing that if it doesn’t seem to be working at all.

Plus, my observations tell me his problems are not upper GI (reflux) but lower GI (intestinal gas). He seems to groan, grunt, push as if constipated and a fart or two will come out, but clearly there is more gas trapped in there which is what is making him so uncomfortable.

The pedi said there isn’t much more that he can do for us and gave us the name of a Pediatric Gastro-enterologist. I’m not sure we want to go down that route as I’m not willing for him to have any invasive procedures or tests. I would let them test his poop for any signs of bacteria or infection, so that may be something we will look into.

In the meantime, I finally coordinated all the necessary referrals to have a meeting with a Lactation Consultant two days ago.

The results were very interesting!

I had thought the bulk of our discussion would center around my diet (should i go back on dairy or not, clearly it hasn’t helped at all - what else could be causing the fussiness?) but instead, towards the end of our meeting she did a physical exam of Jasper’s mouth… and guess what? Turns out he’s tongue tied!

His upper lip is completely tied (and explains why I’ve never been able to get him to flange it correctly during nursing) and his tongue is 4th degree tied (also called “posterior tongue tie” or “simple presentation”). This means that it’s tied farther back that the “classic” presentation which is quite obvious just by looking because the baby’s tongue is actually heart shaped.

Tongue tie doens’t just hurt the mom’s nipples (mine are actually fine) it also causes fusiness during feeding and colic symptoms due to a difficulty in coordinated breathing and swallowing, particularly with the posterior tie which is counter-intuitive because it is the less “drastic” of all of the presentations. It also causes the baby to tire out and fall asleep before getting all the milk it needs. This makes perfect sense to me because Jasper has always done that, but lately (probably because his nutritional needs are higher now) he needs to eat, falls alseep and wakes up hungry no more than 30 minutes later. He also has been needing to eat every two hours rather than three for the past two days. With the double feedings and the two hours, he is almost CONSTANTLY at the breast.

There is an excellent article called “Congenital Tongue Tie and it’s Impact on Breastfeeding” by Elizabeth Coryllos, MD, MSs, FAAP, FACS, FRCSc, IBCLC; Catherine Watson Genna, BS, IBCLC and Alexander C. Salloum, MD, MA that explains all of this in-depth and it is a very interesting read if you suspect your little one may suffer from any degree of tongue-tie.

Fortunately for us, Dr. Coryllos, perhaps the foremost expert on tongue-ties and breastfeeding and the lead author of that article lives only 1.5 hours away from us, so I’m making an appointment for Jasper to see her ASAP - hopefully this week.

In the meantime, I  started eating dairy and soy again.  In the almost three weeks I was off them, Jasper got worse and not better, so I figured it was time to stop torturing myself! Plus I feel pretty confident that the problem is mechanical in the way he is eating. If it were dietary, I would expect him to be fussy AFTER he eats. But Jasper is fussy WHILE he eats (and after too).

The L.C. also encouraged me to take him to a chiropractor and cited this Danish Study that showed chiropractic manipulation to help colic babies more than drugs.  We had already taken him to cranial sacral therapy once, so we are going to take him back for at least 3 more treatments, as this study showed that was the number of manipulations needed to see improvement.

I’ll keep you posted on these new developments.. wish us luck!!

Here is a little video that we took to document the little wheezing sounds that Jasper makes when he sleeps and nurses sometimes. When he was first born, the wheezes were like an octave higher. It’s amazing how fast they grow up!

So at our visit to the pediatrician Friday to get the zantac Rx, I asked him when I should be introducing a bottle given that I plan on going back to work after 3 months. He said “Now!” almost like it might already be too late. I know don’t why but I had in my mind something about 6 weeks, but apartantly if BF is going well, the sooner the better or risk bottle rejection.

So one of my projects for the weekend was to figure out how the hell to use my Medela PISA and our Dr. Brown bottles and our Microwave sterilizer.

I hooked up the PISA and - wow! That thing can pump. Luckily with my milk supply and OALD (overactive let down) I’m a fast pumper. I got 2 oz off of one side in about 4 minutes. I couldn’t have kept going to do a full bottle (4-5oz at his age?) but didn’t want to empty my breast in case he rejected the bottle so I could feed him off it.

I needn’t have worried, Jasper attacked the bottle with the same ferocity that he attacks my boobs - barracuda style. Interestingly though, he arched, fussed and pulled off in exactly the same manner that he does while at the breast. So there goes my OALD oversupply theory - I mean I know a bottle is a bit faster than the average breast, but the behavior was so similar that it MUST be something in the milk that’s bothering him.. or maybe it’s the way he’s sucking or eating?

UGH, the mystery continues!

I am trying to arrange an appointment with a Lactation consultant who comes highly recommended. She even takes Aetna! But in order for ins. to cover it, we need a referral from Jasper’s pedi as well as my primary, so I’m waiting for those to come in. I’m hoping her knowledge and experience can shed some light on our issues.

In the meantime, Jasper actually fed and went down really easy last night all three times.. the problem was he grunted and arched all night in his sleep, making it difficult for me to get any sleep (Jeff is jet-lagged from his trip to China and had no problem sleeping through it!)

Poor little guy seems so unhappy. Unfortunately it seems to be carrying through to this morning, he’s an unhappy camper,  but maybe because he hasn’t had his zantac yet. Not for lack of trying, I gave it to him 10 minutes ago, but then he prompty spit up a minute later. I would give it again but now he has hiccups.

I think it’s going to be a long day!

But first a little video of Jeff’s “Is Jasper Hungry” test!

I want to thank you all for your extremely thoughtful and useful advice on Jasper’s “colic” situation. I put “colic” in quotes because I don’t think his discomfort is colic at all, as colic is defined as ocurring only during a certain three hour period of the day. Jasper’s discomfort can appear at any time during the day (sometimes all day!).

In an act of desperation, I called our pediatrician to go in for a sick visit yesterday rather than wait for his one month well visit next Thursday.  An extra week of this hell seemed too long to endure! I wanted to try the zantac.

My reasoning is simple, first of all, reflux is much more common than milk protein, soy or any other allergy, so it makes sense to try the treatment for reflux first.  Second, its much easier to test for reflux vs. allergies because if he makes a miraculous turn around a day or two after starting zantac, we have our answer.  Dietary changes are a bit harder to pinpoint, particularly when you’re trying more than one thing at once. Also, I am only at week two of dairy elimination from my diet, and I couldn’t imagine waiting two more weeks to get some relief for our poor little guy. And third , selfish as it may be, I have little to no desire to go on a boiled chicken and rice diet unless I’m pretty sure I’ve exhausted the other options!

So we started Jasper on a super low dose (.8ml) of Zantac last night. So far I’ve noticed a bit less of the agressive throat clearing (which I call “the sound of the devil”) but he still writhed in gas pain for an hour and a half last night and periodically througout the day today. Obviously it’s too soon to tell, but I’m beginning to form a different opinion of our problem all together…

My new self diganosis? Overactive let down (and overactive milk supply.) I think there may also be a reflux problem, but the hours of writhing in gas pain can definitely be accounted for by my super forceful let down and abundant milk supply.

This article on Kellymom describes every one of our symptoms to a T.. the frequent pulling off (which often results in my milk squirting poor Jasper in the face!), choking, sputtering, clicking sounds etc. all of which results in him swallowing too much air and causes intestinal pain an hour or two later.

Interestingly, it also can cause too much foremilk to be swallowed, which causes even more gas due to it’s high lactose content.

I’m going to try forcing him off and catching the let down in a cloth a couple of times and see how that goes. It’s a messy business doing that, but maybe the answer to our problems.

It’s funny, I never would have pegged me for an oversupply kind of gal given that I didn’t “leak” at all during my pregnancy which I know some people do.. I also never drink enough water, but I guess those aren’t predictors of supply or I wouldn’t be in this situation.

I’ll keep you posted.. hopefully I’ll have my angel baby back in a matter of a few days rather than a few months!

Update: I tried pumping and giving Jasper a bottle for the first time yesterday - he behaved exactly like he does at the breast.. alternately writhing, spitting it out, arching and attacking it ravenously.. so now it seems it’s unlikely it’s just my let down if he does the same thing at the bottle. I also reread the symptoms of reflux and they are pretty much the same as the overactive let down.. so now I’m just as perplexed as ever!

I have maybe 5 seconds before Jasper gets bored of the swing and starts screaming, so if this post gets cut of half way, you’ll know why!

Some highs and lows of our second week…

Highs:

Bath Time

Jasper’s umbilical cord finally fell off! We celebrated by giving him his first real bath, which he loved (much to my relief!)

Jasper got to meet both my sister (auntie Roxy) who came to stay with me because Jeff had to travel to Hong Kong and his great Auntie Diane who came to meet him all the way from Scotland!

Jasper and Auntie Roxy

Jasper also got to meet Mike, Tracy and Gemma for the first time..

Lows..

Jasper has developed pretty severe colic. He grunts, turns red and cries even in his sleep and it breaks my heart to see him in so much pain. He even does it at the breast and pulls off while eating. It also means I haven’t slept in days. In fact I didn’t realize it was even possible to function on such little sleep!

I cut out dairy about a week ago, it doesn’t seem to have made any difference yet. In place of the dairy I substituted soy (soy milk, cream cheese etc.) but have now cut that out too.. and even anything that could promote yeast like beer, or sweets. Basically I’ve become a breatharian. I’d do anything to make it better, but unfortunately it’s almost impossible to pinpoint what is causing him such distress.

Fortunately our little guy is superbaby - and is still thriving despite all the pain and lack of good quality sleep:

Super Baby!

His cryptonite is gas pain - (or reflux?)

If anyone has any suggestions on fighting colic, please let me know. We’ve tried cocyntal, gripe water, cranial sacral therapy and mylicon with no luck. At his one month appointment we’ll try baby zantac.

In summary, the second week has been HARD.. terrible twos indeed!

Jasper, 9 Days Old

So for those of you still expecting, I thought I’d put together a list of the items we are loving and using all the time.

1) The Miracle Blanket. Jasper is quite the Houdini. Jeff is a great swadler, but despite his best efforts Jasper always managed to break free of the swaddle me’s and regular receiving blanket swaddles we tried to use on him. If it were not for the miracle blanket I would not have slept since we got home from the hospital!

2) Organic cloth diapers for burp cloths.  We have at least 2 in every room of the house!

3) Medela Lanolin Nipple Cream.  Most people get the Lansinoh as I did, but I had a sample of the Medela and tried it once. The consistency of it is much softer (more like honey and less sticky) than Lansinoh, which makes it easier to spread on sore nipples without hurting them even more.

4) Pamper’s Swaddler’s Sensitive.  We got spoiled by the hospital diapers that have a yellow line that turns green when baby has peed. Regular Pamper’s swadlers don’t have this, but the sensitive ones do. It’s nice to take a quick peek and know if he needs to be changed rather than have to do a thourough investigation!

5) Moby style Wrap. Jasper doesn’t really like his bouncy chair or swing yet and he’s recently developed GERD or Colic or something with the same symptoms (more on that fabulous development later…) and being in the wrap is one of the only ways to comfort him.  Plus I can get things done because I’m hands free!

5) Our ihome clock/radio/ipod dock. Nursing in the middle of the night can get lonely.. I like listening to NPR or music while we’re nursing. It’s also one of the only ways I have any idea what’s going on in the outside world.

6) This handy breastfeeding/diaper changing log that Jeff made for me in excel.  Without it, I would have no idea the last time I fed him, how many poopy diaper’s he’s had (so I know he’s getting enough hindmilk) or what side I fed him from last. This chart is my lifeline. Feel free to download and use yourself!

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I could write a novel about this first week, but the highlights will have to do, I don’t get much time between feedings (he eats like a sumo wrestler!)

A few recollections of our stay at Phelps after Jasper was born..

The special care nursery was very loud, there was a little baby girl that screamed at the top of her lungs 24/7 and lots of beeping monitors. Jasper had a little splint on his hand to protect the IV site they opened to administer IV antibiotics. The special care nurse would call our room to wake me up every 2 hours to come in and feed him or sooner if he acted hungry during the night. During the day I would just show up to either feed or spend time with him.

He was very sleepy those first 2 days. Even when the nurses pricked him multiple times to take blood sugar levels, or bilirubin tests he didn’t even wake up. He would wake up to nurse though.. and wow, that boy can SUCK!

Apparently I am a good lactater - my colostrum was almost as plentiful as mature milk. At the hospital he nursed 20-30 minutes on each side. I would leave to go rest and need to come back just an hour or so later to nurse again.

All in all nursing has been going extremely well, save one meltdown I had at the hospital. When Jasper first latches on it HURTS! He has a very strong suck and I guess my nipples are sensitive so I was convinced he was latching wrong even though some of the special care nurses said it looked correct.

The on staff lactation consultant came to observe us and declared that she doesn’t go by visuals, she goes by what I’m telling her I’m feeling, so if it hurts the latch must be wrong and she made me unlatch him and try some different things.

Her words had me convinced we weren’t doing it right, and in the meantime the pediatricians were telling us that now that Jasper had to be under the bili lights, he was at high risk of dehydration and would need to nurse a lot or else they would supplement him with formula (from a cup to avoid nipple confusion.) At one point they actually did try to give him formula, but Jasper refused it (good little man!) I was so worried about him getting dehydrated and now totally convinced we didn’t know how to breast feed that I woke up Thursday morning and asked to see the lactation consultant again.

I was told there weren’t any coming in that day. I totally freaked at that point - one of the reasons I chose Phelps was their strong commitment and support of nursing and the fact that they have lactation consultants on staff. Here I was struggling, my son in special care and there wasn’t anyone to help us other than the nurses who know alot, but aren’t specialists.

I cried at the nurses station and walked my way over to the special care nursery where there was a new nurse on duty. She asked why I was crying and I told her, and she said that whoever told me if it hurts you are doing it wrong is full of it. She nursed 3 children and when they first latch on, particularly until your nipples toughen up a bit it hurts like hell.

I felt SO MUCH better just knowing it was normal! I didn’t care at all about the pain, that I could handle just fine, it was me thinking we were doing it wrong and that my nipples would start cracking and bleeding making it hard for me to nurse later that I had been worried about.

After that incident, we have been breastfeeding confident and well ever since (though it still hurts like hell when he first latches which he does rather aggressively).

Other highlights were bringing our little guy home for the first time of course.. and then having Sarah, Jay and baby Daphne come to visit! Jasper also met his grandfather for the first time on Sunday. My dad was overseas when Jasper was born - on his birthday!

Friday, the day after our release from Phelps we took Jasper to his first visit with the pediatrician. He was only 4 oz. under his birth weight, which is great for being 3 days old. We also had to take him to a pediatric cardiologist due to a slight murmur.. we did that on his one week birthday on Tuesday. He was already 8lbs 10oz, so he gained a full lb from Friday at the pediatrician’s. So yes, I guess you could say breastfeeding is going very very well!

Our only trouble has been with his stomach. Being on antibiotics for his first 48 hours did a number on his little GI tract. He finally recovered from the diarreah (we are giving him baby pro-biotics) but he still suffers from reflux and I have to burp him several times during each feeding so that he can be comfortable enough to continue eating. If he’s gassy he really hates being on his back so sometimes its hard to get him to sleep comfortably.

For me one of the most amazing things about this first week with our baby is watching my husband transform into a father. He truly is super dad. Not only is he totally in love with Jasper, but he’s a complete natural with him and Jasper loves being with him. Jeff has also been extraordinary about making things easier for me, from cleaning the house every night after Jasper and I go to sleep to making us a really handy diaper change/breast feeding log that we use so I know how long it’s been since the last feeding and so that we know he’s staying hydrated and well fed. I bawled my eyes out the day before he went back to work.

Thankfully, my mom has been completely amazing and has brought or cooked us dinner every night since being home. She has run errands to the grocery store, buy buy baby, babies R Us, the pharmacy and come over every day since Jeff went back to work to help me. She has taken us to our doctor’s appointments and just been completely there for us for whatever we need. I can’t imagine what we would do without her.

And then there is just the joy and wonder of spending time with our precious son.. I could spend all day just staring at him and the cute little faces he makes, the adorable little squeaks and squeals.. sometimes Jeff and I just stop and ask each other if seriously, isn’t he the cutest little boy in the world? I mean, we can be totally objective right?

:)

First of all I want to say thank you for the incredible outpouring of well wishes, it means so much to all of us!

I’m sorry I didn’t post sooner, as you can imagine life with a newborn makes finding time to post more difficult. The birth story is also fairly lengthly as you are about to find out..

But first, the story in pictures:

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And now the birth story in short because most people won’t have the time or stamina to get through the full account (all 18 hours of it!)

The abbreviated version:

Monday August 17th I went into labor around 7pm. We were at the mall so we rushed home to pack our remaining items into the hospital bag. There had been some discussion earlier in the day with my midwives that my water had actually broken sometime that afternoon. (A high leak, not a full break though).

I labored for 6-7 excruciating hours of full on back labor making very little progress (Jasper was in posterior position) before deciding to get an epidural. This decision proved to be very wise because I had no idea that there were 12 more hours yet to come and a very prolonged pushing stage for which I would need to save my strength.

At some point during my slow dilation process Jasper’s heart rate started to decel to dangerously low levels between contractions. Unlike decels during contractions (which are the baby’s normal response to the contraction) these likely indicated a cord issue and the back up OB was called. He observed the decels and immediately booked an OR for a c-section.

Because he is an amazing and wonderful doctor, instead of sectioning me immediately, he allowed me to continue to labor as long as Jasper’s heart rate would return to normal before the next contraction. Part of this is also due to the fact that I started dilating extremely rapidly right at this point. It had taken me about 14-16 hours to get to 6cm but I went from 7-10 in no more than an hour. It was only because I was ready to push that they let me see if I could get the baby out before they needed to step in and do a section.

At around 11am Tuesday August 19th I started pushing. And I pushed and pushed but with the baby being posterior, he was having a really hard time fitting under the pubic bone. Then they turned off the epidural to make sure I was pushing as effectively as possible - Jasper needed to come out NOW.

The second (anesthesia free) hour of pushing was the most difficult and painful hour of my life. I seriously did not think I could do it. There was a point during the crowning where I started screaming to just get him out of me! The midwife actually attempted an epesiotomy (not to avoid a natural tear but to speed things along because the heart rate was such an issue) but later told me she couldn’t even fit the scissors in (sorry, way TMI.)

At 1:14pm August 19th with one final excruciating push I delivered Jasper’s head followed quickly by his body and our son was born!

The long and detailed version:

Monday August 18th.

2:45pm - Appointment with Midwife Lisha
At this point it is my third day of prodromal labor, I’ve woken up for 3 straight days with contractions thinking this would be the day! Three times that day before the appointment I felt a small gush and found bloody show and what I thought was left over thin mucus plug. I am devastated to find out from her internal that for the THIRD week in a row I am still at a fingertip - 1cm dilated and 50% effaced. Lisha does a fairly “vigorous” internal. She asks me why I think that those gushes weren’t amniotic fluid and does some litmus test strip that shows it was, but that could have been from the mucus. I am going over to the hospital anyway to see midwife Judy for a Non Stress Test. Lisha calls Judy and tells her to do the ferning test to see if my water has broken.

After a normal NST, Judy does the litmus test strip again which this time shows negative. ARGH! She also does the ferning test and does NOT see ferning, so no water. She still thinks MAYBE it’s a slow leak and asks me if I want to walk around for a couple hours and have her check me for dilation. I tell her I’d rather go labor at home for a while if I do indeed go into labor. We say goodbye and she tells me she has a feeling I might be back that night.

Jeff & I decide to go to the mall to walk around a bit, try to get things moving. We have an early dinner and walk down to old navy. I get my first real labor contraction, only it doesn’t last just a minute, its like one long 5 minute contraction. I am sitting down at a bench in the mall telling jeff I’m not sure I’ll make it out!

We make it home and start timing the contractions. They are about 7-8 minutes apart. I have another gush and call Judy who tells me to come in because she feels certain that I have a high leak.

I am FRANTICALLY packing our last minute stuff for the hospital, all the while pausing between the contractions to sit on the birthing ball. I realize that they are getting very painful very fast.

We finish packing and arrive at Phelps Hospital at 10pm.

Judy checks me and says I’m a “loose” 1cm and 80% effaced. She confirms that there is only a bag of forewaters meaning I did have a leak/break somewhere else along the way.

I am incredibly lucky that I got the best birthing room at Phelps, it is large and has a HUGE whirlpool tub that I promptly get in with the Jets aiming at my back. This is very soothing because I am having pretty bad back labor. I stay in the tub for about 2 hours at which point they need me to get out for some monitoring and to check my progress. After about 6-7 hours of labor I am only about 1-2 centimeters 80% effaced, but according to Judy the head is low at plus 1 station.

When I got this news something snapped. I have been having HORRIBLE back labor and all of the different positions we were trying weren’t doing a thing to make it even slightly more tolerable. The fact that I was barely dilating despite this excruciating pain was more than I could take.

Then the nurse uttered the magic words that the anesthesiologist was at the hospital to administer an epidural to another woman in Labor. The idea of letting him go home without also giving me an epidural was too much to bear.

My midwife tried convincing me to try stadol first, she thought it would allow me to get some sleep. But by this point, I knew I wouldn’t make it through this labor without getting an epidural at some point, and I told her I’d rather get just an epidural than an epidural AND stadol.

Best decision EVER!

The relief was immediate, and we were able to get a few hours of sleep.

At 7am the next morning, my midwife Judy came in to say she was leaving and that Sheila was coming on. She checked me one last time and pronounced me to only be at 3-4 centimeters but plus one station. So in 12 hours of labor I’d made a measly 3-4 centimeters progress.

When Sheila came in an hour or so later she checked me again and said I was three centimeters and zero station… so now I was not only progressing but REgressing!

The next part is a little blurry for me, but next thing I know they are waking me up and putting the oxygen mask on me. The baby’s heartrate is decelerating - not during contractions (which is normal) but AFTER each contraction which usually indicates a cord issue. They try chaning my position, but nothing seemed to help. The heartrate always rebounded, but Sheila called in their back up OB Dr. Mendellowitz (aka the OB from heaven). He watched the heart tracing and immediately opened the OR for me.

In the meantime, Sheila checks me again and lo and behold - PROGRESS. I’m at 8! They continue to monitor the baby’s heart rate after each contraction. At this point the midwife starts doing scalp stimulation on the baby’s head during every decel. A short time later at my next check I am pronounced to be at 10 - ready to push! I don’t remember exactly, but I’d say it took me about 14 hours to get from 1cm to 4 cms and maybe 2 hours (tops) to get from 5-10, and maybe just half an hour of that was getting from 8-10.

It was this rapid dilation that ultimately allowed me to very narrowly escape a c-section as it was clear the baby needed to come out as soon as possible.

The first hour of pushing went ok, but because the heart rate decels were getting more serious they needed to speed things along and it was then that I heard the most frightening words ever: “Turn off the epidural”.

Somewhere at this point they realized that the baby was posterior (explaining my horrendous back labor from the very beginning) and that pushing him under the pubic bone was going to be very difficult. (I recalled that during childbirth class they demonstrated this phenomenon with a model of a pelvis and a doll.)

The second hour (yes I pushed for two hours!) was the most hellish hour I hope to ever have in this lifetime. The epidural wore out with surprising speed and soon I was “laboring naturally” - just in time for the most painful part.

The pushing did go better once the epidural wore off and after what seemed like an eternity, I felt the baby start to crown.

Oh my god.

The point at which the head starts to come out and stays part way out between contractions is when I totally lost it. I don’t really recall everything I said, but I do know I started crying that I couldn’t do it and to please just get the baby out! I also remember thinking there was NO way I could push through that pain.. they were going to have to just cut it out somehow.

No sooner had I thought that than Sheila started coming at me with the scissors. I literally screamed “No! No episiotomy!!” and started writhing on the table. Perhaps motivated by the sight of the scissors, I gave it one more push and this time the head came out followed pretty much immediately by the rest of his body.

I can’t even describe the feeling of relief that I felt at that moment. Relief that labor was over, relief that the baby was healthy, relief that I had made it through it one piece with only a 1st degree tear, and a huge relief that my caregivers gave me and my body the opportunity to labor rather than section me at the first sign of trouble.

And then I saw my son for the first time.. and my world changed.

“He’s so beautiful!” were my first words when they put this precious little being on my chest.
(I had been prepared for him to look like a wrinkly old man like so many newborns do!)

He latched on right away and we managed to get a few minutes skin to skin before they whisked him away to be evaluated by the neonatologist… due to the long labor and my water having been broken for so many hours both Jasper and I had a fever.

Our fevers meant that instead of Jasper being able to room in with us at the hospital he would have to go to the special care nursery to be monitored around the clock and administered preventative IV antibiotics.

The news only got worse when they told me that because my blood type is O positive and Japser is A positive, we have ABO incompatibility and tested coombs positive. This meant Jasper had a much higher than normal chance at becoming severely jaundiced. He would have to spend at least 24 hours under the bili lights and then would have to be tested again.

They told us it was unlikely he’d be ready for discharge when we were.

I could write a novel about all the events and happenings those 36 hours in recovery, but that’s not really part of the birth story, and this post is quite long enough as it is.

The long and the short of it is all the cultures came back negative for infection and Jasper’s biliruben levels were normal so we were cleared to take him home with us after all!

And that is the long and short story of Jasper’s birth..and the beginning of a whole new chapter.

Thank you all for sharing in our joy :)